I don't come with answers.
I come with presence, with questions,
and with the strange conviction
that the holy still moves
in the places we've abandoned.
Poet · Post-Christian Theologian · Spiritual Director · Chaplain-in-Formation
I'm Aaron — a poet, a post-Christian theologian, a spiritual director, and a chaplain-in-formation. I live in Oregon, where the rain is honest and Portland keeps us weird. The thread that holds all of this together is longer than I can explain in a sentence, but it's here if you want to follow it.
About Aaron and his work →Spiritual Direction
If you're in the middle of something — a faith that's shifting, a grief that won't name itself, a question that keeps returning — spiritual direction offers a particular kind of accompaniment. Not advice. Not answers. Presence, and careful attention to what's already alive in you.
Poetry, Prose, Prayer and Protest
Words written at the edge of faith and its unraveling — poetry, prose, prayer, and protest in the form of theological essays, devotional prose, and the occasional act of liturgical defiance. The writing lives at The Cluttered Mouth.
Spiritual Direction
Not advice. Accompaniment.
Spiritual direction is one of the oldest forms of soul care in the contemplative tradition. It is not therapy, not pastoral counseling, not advice-giving. It is the practice of listening together to what is already alive in you: the movements of longing, grief, wonder, doubt, and the startling glimpses of something holy.
Who this is for
People who have left the church but haven't left the longing. Those in the middle of theological deconstruction who still sense something sacred beneath the rubble. Queer people who have been told their bodies are problems to be solved. Survivors of religious trauma who need someone who won't flinch at their anger. People with no religious background at all, who simply feel the weight of their own inner life and want a guide. If you are somewhere in that territory, this may be for you.
How I work
My approach is trauma-informed and rooted in the contemplative tradition — Ignatian discernment, centering prayer, the practices of stillness that cross traditions. I draw on Internal Family Systems (IFS) as one framework for understanding the inner life, and I work from a post-Christian, queer-affirming, incarnational theology that takes the body seriously, honors lament, and refuses to spiritualize suffering away. There is no correct doctrine required. There is no belief you need to hold. There is only the honest conversation about what is actually happening in you.
What to expect
Sessions are typically 50 minutes, held via Zoom. We typially meet about once a month, but always can meet more frequently if you are in a season of particular intensity. I keep notes that stay between us so we can trace the story of the Sprit and you throught your life. I ask more questions than I answer. I am not here to fix you — I am here to sit with you while you discover what the Spirit is saying to you, what you are saying to the Spirit, and what you are saying to yourself.
I am currently accepting new directees.
If something in you is stirring — if you're curious, or cautious, or somewhere in the middle — I'd be glad to hear from you. The first conversation carries no obligation. It is simply a conversation about what could be.
Thank you. I'll be in touch within a few days.
Writing
Everything stuck in the throat. Poetry. Prose. Prayer. Protest.
Poetry
These poems were written at the edge of language — where faith breaks down and something else comes through.
The First Time I Read Poetry with Pádraig Ó Tuama
I had a dream before I woke up— / they often happen that way, before I wake up.
Read →Essays & Theology
Prose written from inside the questions — post-Christian theology, contemplative practice, trauma, liberation, and the long work of unlearning.
Aaron J. Smith
Formation
I'm a poet, a spiritual director, a post-Christian theologian, a chaplain-in-formation, and kind of a mess. I contain multitudes. After growing up in Utah, I moved to Oregon where I now live with my wife and two kids. I drink too much coffee and not enough water.
I've been deconstructing and reconstructing for over twenty years. Religious trauma and church hurt are intimately part of my story. So is the slow, strange work of finding that the Jesus story — stripped of the institution's need to manage it — still has something worth following.
Theological Formation
My theology is post-Christian in the sense that I no longer hold the dogmatic structures of Christianity — but I have not abandonded the tradition so much as I have learned to read it differently, against itself, through the lens of those it has harmed. The through-line in my theological thinking is kenosis: God's self-donation as the shape of divinity itself, which means that power-over is always a theological problem, and vulnerability is always a theological resource. My framework — Incarnational, Lamenting, Liberative — grounds my work in the body, takes suffering seriously rather than spiritualizing it, and orients everything toward liberation for the marginalized.
Chaplaincy Formation
I am in the process of ordination through the Order of Hildegard, a diverse, cross-vocational, inter-spiritual Order and Community of Practice. My chaplaincy formation is oriented toward community and interfaith work — accompaniment outside the walls of any single tradition, in the ordinary places where people are actually suffering, surviving, and seeking.
I am not trying to build a platform. I am trying to be faithful to the thread — the one that runs through the poems and the theology and the direction sessions and the slowly forming chaplaincy. If you're here, you've probably found a piece of that thread. Welcome.
Thank you. I'll be in touch.